typical rant.

okay i know how busy people can get. i mean, hello, i'm in college and i have so many commitments to carry out.

i have began serving in the children's meetings on Lord's Day and when i say children i actually mean kids who are only about 3 years younger than me. i'm practically one of them. what's more, the new morning revival that we have to pursue from next week onwards is actually TWO weeks at a time because we have two books that we'll be pursuing simultaneously. also, this Lord's Day will be the commencement of the 96-lessons training, which comprises 96 weeks of training material. i have to pursue it for an hour everyday, and i have to meet up with saints every week to have fellowship and pursue. what's more, i have assignments, projects, tests to study for, lab reports and various other annoying necessities that have to be carried out. do i like them? no! but that's life! if i want to get to medical school well that's just what i have to do!

and you think YOUR life is difficult? huh? wait until you get into my position, then you'll understand. you'll be crying out for attention.

you think YOU'RE busy? wait until you have to start juggling your school, social and spiritual life the way i do. wait until you're stuck in the middle of nowhere without the ability to just call up or text whoever i like at whatever time of day and wherever i am. think you'll survive? FORGET IT. you know nothing about survival.

sometimes i get so lonely i cry. you do NOT know the meaning of loneliness.

i know we shouldn't judge each other. i didn't judge first. rather, i was judged.

so let's leave it to God to be the judge yeah?

don't be so hasty to brush things away. you never know when they might disappear.

dizzy spells

today was probably one of the most - if not the most - sien days of my life.

it was partly my fault, because instead of using the first two hours of my three hour lunch break to compile my biology group report, i instead went shopping with Wengweng in Supré (THEIR SALE IS ABOUT TO END, OKAYY!!!). this resulted in carefree time-wasting trying on clothes and trying to decide on which skirt Wengweng should get. in the end, she got both. LOL.

yes, it took us two hours to go shopping at Rundle. and that was just ONE shop - Supré. imagine if we had wanted to go to more shops *shudder*. but nahh, we're saving our happiness up for HARBOURTOWN THIS WEEKEND!!!! =D bargain clothes, here we come!!!

it was only when i got to the computer lab at 10 Pulteney that i realized i had forgot to bring my own drawings of the specimens we viewed under the microscopes last week (each lab partner needed to submit his/her own drawings even though the report itself was a group effort). PANIC FLOODED MY MIND. i couldn't think, literally. luckily Angeline (Angel-ine) and Elle were there to help me out.

i called Peter to ask him if he could make an exception this one time and either extend the due date of the report or let me off without handing in any drawings. he did neither. he said it was my responsibility to make sure i bring my drawings and hand in my report on time. SIGH. but true, indeed it was my responsibility. at least i didn't bring down the grades of my lab partners, cos they brought theirs.

i looked at the percentage distribution for different components of our syllabus. THANK GOODNESS, practical reports had a mere 5%. but EVEN THEN, i could feel any chance of an MBBS slipping out of my butter fingers. i guess that was my kiasu nature coming out. I DIDN'T WANT OTHERS TO HAVE AN ADVANTAGE OVER MEEEE...

the stress piled up. when i got to biology lab class, Peter then told me that if i could go home quickly, pick it up, and bring it back to him before 5pm, then he would accept it. Any later and it would be a zero for us. EEK! you cannot imagine the amount of pressure that was upon my poor aching shoulders.

despite the tight schedule i had to keep to (2 hours to go home by train, fix up our report and making any changes, come back by train, walk ALL the way back along North Terrace to the uni, and then hand it in), my mind was flooded with relief, flooded to the point where my thinking skills were then drowned under the sudden tidal wave of relief. throughout the lesson, i kept doing stupid things. i left the hydrogen peroxide bottle open even after Peter repeatedly told us to close all bottles, i threw tissues containing bits of liver into the paper bin NOT the biological waste bin which i should have used instead, i ruined one of the pipette filler bulbs by squeezing the S-valve too hard and making the liquid shoot straight up the pipette and into the bulb. (i then removed the bulb, set it aside, and pretended it never happened. it was hilarious because later i complained to Peter that all the bulbs were faulty. he came over to me, picked up the one that i had ruined and said, "this one looks okay, but someone's gone and put liquid in it. oh well guess you'll have to use another one" HEHEHE SORRY PETER, MY BAD). i also was trying to shake the water off a tiny beaker at the sink, and with my caveman-like dexterity, i accidentally banged it against the side of the sink. luckily it didn't break. HAHA. oh yeah, i also didn't realize that the 1mL pipette was 1mL in capacity. i thought it was 10mL. so i was wondering why 1mL seemed like only a couple of drops of liquid... HAHAHA... like i said, my brain wasn't working...

anywho, i have to go to bed like pretty soon, so long story short, i managed to go home and get the report done, then i had to RUN for the 4:04pm train cos i had like 6 minutes to get to the stop. then i brisked walked to the student centre at the uni and printed out my report, and then i brisked walked to Jordan Labs to give it to Peter. i at least managed to squeeze some emotion out of Peter when he looked at me pityingly and said, "Aw, poor thing." Well at least i managed to get some exercise. haha.

so yeah. albeit the EXTREME exhaustion that resulted from today's fiasco, i am feeling AWESOME. praise the Lord. really, it was calling on His name that kept me going... calling on His name, and singing hymns absent-mindedly to myself.. yeah.. that about sums up my spiritual life... HAHAHA =P only joking. i still do morning revival XD

PEACE OUTTT

some consideration

Question: can people REALLY be that insensitive?

Answer: Yes they can.

one summer's day

well i just got back from singapore about an hour ago and i'm doing various things, such as listening to the Spirited Away soundtrack by Joe Hisaishi on YouTube... seriously, this guy's a genius. i love the song! i wish i could learn it but i'm sure the music score costs money, and it won't be cheap..

anyhow, singapore was great. the hotel i stayed in was amazing; probably the best hotel i've ever been too. as usual, mum and i raided the hotel room for cool freebies. haha. out of our best loot, we got some bars of white moss Acca Kappa soap. i can't believe they were giving them away like soup at a soup kitchen. we also took their ultra-comfortable bed room slippers. =)

i watched Spirited Away again =) this time, i watched the Japanese version. Ma promised to watch it with me. but she fell asleep even before we reached the part where Chihiro meets Yubaba. This emoticon is now extremely accurate--> =_=

she REFUSED to even try to keep awake! maybe it's because we only started watching the movie at 11:45PM =P

well it doesn't matter, cos she fell asleep and i had to carry on by myself =( she said it was boring and childish and she didn't understand why i liked it so much. OH IF ONLY SHE KNEW =D

so i watched the rest of the movie by myself, which was like, 95% of the movie. it was good, of course, but i still prefer the Walt Disney english dub version. it's easier for me to watch. but both are good la! i still prefer Haku's voice in the english dub. it's more masculine and more comforting ^^ ahhh.... i was making screenshots of Spirited Away scenes and pasting them in a Microsoft Word document.. haha... okay maybe a little too obsessed? =)

anyway, enough about Haku and Spirited Away. i did some quality shopping while i was in Singapore. i bought a pair of skinny jeans from Esprit (70% off!!!) and a Baby-G watch. well okay the watch was bought by my dad. hahaha. it's yellow and it's AWESOME. =)

i also got loads of ang-pows. good luck/farewell presents from the various aunties. what's more, they're in singapore dollars =D i also got some from my Penang relatives. woo hoooo!

they gave us free bath salts so i took a hot bath once a day for two days. it was much needed, if i may say so. running around the hospital on Ko's behalf was quite tiring. but praise the Lord that his condition has been diagnosed! it's a thyroid gland problem and he really needs to take care of his health now.. it was a weird feeling, rushing around the hospital that day.. We went to Mount Elizabeth Medical Centre to see the doctors there. it was very educational! i really respect them, and it kinda makes me wanna be a doctor even more... They were very kind to Ko despite his tendency to be irrational. Anyway, i was saying that it was a weird feeling. Weird because it was a mixture of feelings. On the one hand, i felt extremely tired because the lifts took too long to come so i had to use the stairs to run from the Laboratory to the seats where Ko was sitting. Up down up down up down up down GAHHHHH. Yeah. So it was pretty tiring. On the other hand, i was also feeling rather good about myself; i've always wanted to be sort of the big sis, right? And that was my chance. I felt really responsible talking to the doctors and the nurses on my brother's behalf, cos he was too upset to talk to them. The third feeling was a slight anxiety... It was mainly brought upon by my parents saying things like, "In Australia you keep his medicine for him, okay?" or "You must accompany him to see the doctors. Make sure he's OK." and other things like that. I know i should help out and be responsible for my family's sake, but i'm just 16 going on 17, having to take care of a 23 year old! Well i guess that's God's plan for me... He always knows the best ways to transform us... I just hope i can gain more of Christ during this entire process. And BTW, here's the premium statement made by my dad: "Your Ko's health condition makes me feel even more sure about you doing medicine, so that you can help him."

YEAP.

Well I'm glad that after two hectic chaos-filled days we were able to finally relax and have a REAL family dinner. we went to this amazing Italian restaurant! I think i've put on weight =( i haven't done any exercise since the Penang trip. I feel fat.

Anyway, doesn't matter! Cos it's ALLLLL good =)

More updates soon! One week left of Malaysia, then it's Adelaide. SIGH.

long time no blog

hello to anyone who reads my blog. as i recently found out, people actually do. HURRAH! thanks to Celine's PR-ing on her own blog, which looks much much cooler than mine :(

anyway, I AM UNDER CONSTANT CREATIVE PRESSURE. art deal not going too well at the mo, trying to find more artist influences that i haven't ALREADY used.... maybe i should go back to my beloved Cherry Hood.

i want to make that money WORTH IT, you know? i want to have earned it, and then lie back and pat my tummy and close my eyes and exhale deeply and say, "Good on you, HL!"

so ya. Ms Alford, my all time mentor, has advised me to pay Valentine Willie's Art Gallery in Bangsar Baru, because apparently it's got loads of influence i could benefit from. The name of the gallery itself puzzles me... sounds like Marcus (the short one, haha) may pop out at any moment and go "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!"

returning to my mushroom amidst the stress

Tomorrow, I have Geography Paper 4. A rather useless paper, if you ask me, because obviously everyone is going to do super well on the "joke" Paper 5 and won't even need to look at Paper 4. Anyhow, no matter how much I try to shrug my shoulders and act like I don't care about it, I HAAAVE to at least try to study for it. I just must do a past paper, just to be on the safe side.

Geography is fun. You get to learn cool words like "wetted perimeter" and "rainshadow" and "quadrat" and "transect" and "demographic transition model" and "situ" and "attrition" and "hygrometer" and other various lingo. Sometimes, I want to do Geography just to be able to use these words in my everyday life.

"Oh yes, yes indeed, it's those darn agribusinesses that make our lives so difficult. If only they could just be nomadic farmers and be satisfied with that."

"No, it's not just desertification that's a problem. It's also the overcultivation and soil exhaustion. My, my. Those people don't know how to live sustainably."

"Haha! What a fantastic swash! This long-shore drift sure gets your adrenaline pumping! And the prevailing winds seem to be having a fine time this morning."

So yes. And I should probably be getting back to my work right now. I can't wait to write my literature essays. I'm really going to miss it when I'm in college.