karma much

i've never really appreciated what my mum does for me. i mean, "appreciate" is so ambiguous. how do we actually "appreciate" something?

do we merely say things like "thank you" and "that's wonderful" and "i really needed that" and other niceties when people do things for us? wouldn't that just be forced ceremonial utterance?

how do we "appreciate"? what do people mean when they say "you should appreciate ______ more rather than take it/her/him/me/them for granted"? what i'm really trying to say is, when is it that we don't appreciate? if we don't express our gratitude every hour or even every day, does that make us spoilt brats?

okay, that may be taking it a LEEDLE bit too far. i must admit that at times, it's easy to forget Who made you and Who you should really be thanking. I think we show gratitude towards all the wrong people, and none towards those who really deserve it. Take God for instance. If we can experientally realize what He had to go through to save us from eternal perdition, we would genuinely fall to the ground and declare ourselves unworthy of His love. But the thing is, He showed it to us anyway. And that's what has captured so many lovers of Christ.

Anyway, back to the mum thang. i bought some asam laksa for her this afternoon because i thought it would be very grown-up of me to do so. i especially enjoyed callin gher on my mobile and asking her (with a lot of noise in the background, thus showing how busy i was) if she'd fancy some laksa for lunch. so i bought it, as well as some tasty lekur.

Later on, as she was preparing it, she said, "Aiya. Have to go soon (for sisters' meeting). Shouldn't have asked you to buy the laksa. It doesn't even look that good, anyway."

OHHHH i was offended. i was like, erm excuse me? i trudged around in that damansara place in the hot hot sun to buy that laksa for you and now you're telling me it doesn't look good???"

OH HOW DAAAARE YOU!!!

then i realized, how many times have i not appreciated the food my mum buys or makes for me? it made me think about all those portions of salmon oat porridge i made faces at.... those 101 "healthy" vegetables my mum cooked out the Encyclopedia of Veggies....

unbe-LIEVE-able

i cannot one year has passed since the last english-speaking conference in east malaysia. boy, time does fly when you're having fun.
weeellllll, i wouldn't describe the entire year with the extremely generalized term "fun", but it certainly had its pros.

firstly, i was blessed by being able to fool around in bio and maths/addmaths and yet still get the grades i wanted! :) i am not a clever girl. i am not a lucky girl. i'm a blessed girl :) i still have to quell the urge to go "HAH I TOLD YOU SO!" to ms abuselah the next time i see her, which i hope won't be for quite a while.

i was also blessed enough to try passion fruit, a fruit which most of us only see growing on trees in Farmville or mixed with various chemicals in our Body Shop lipbalm. i actually tried it. i scooped out the soft seeds from their comfortable jelly-like crib and ground them with my molars :) BIO BIO BIO TRIBUTE TO BIO

i overcame many things. fewer than i'd hoped, but many things still. and there are more to come. i overcame youthful lust (for a while, anyway), i overcame the temper-losing demon, i overcame the burden of outward beauty, i overcame the desire to paint my nails in various neon colours, i overcame the devil's smile, i overcame my quiet meeting disposition, i overcame spiritual death.

OH LORD JESUS! it really is a joy to call on His name. a few months back, i'd probably not have given it much thought. but today, i can testify, that His name is above all names. "That in the name of Jesus, every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess, that Jesus Christ is Lord to the glory of God the Father." (Philippians 2:10-11)

Praise the Lord for His overcoming name!

do you know how Jesus died?

i cannot believe what i've decided to do. i have decided to make some drastic changes in my life.

the church conference i attended during the Hari Raya weekend has shown me much light. and as cheesy and trilogy-movie-ish as this sounds, i have found my life's purpose. i am going to serve the Lord.

how? i have no idea. but i guess it's all about my consecration before the Lord, isn't it? and it's all in steps for me. for example, i took the first step by crying my eyes out because i realized that in contrast to all that God has done for me, i've done absolutely nothing for him.

i learned how he died.

and it's not just the same old broken record; this time, i found out the details.

Brother David Vinson laid out every detail of Jesus' crucifixion bare and frank for us to hear. yes, we were amazed, some maybe even appalled, at his boldness. but it's the truth, and that is something no one can argue with.

so how exactly did Jesus die?

He was scourged. a whip of ninetails with sharp pieces of rock/metal hanging on the ends was smashed against His back 39 times. the Romans said that if they whipped you 40 times, you would die. so in order to keep their consciences clean, they gave you some mercy and whipped you only 39 times. each time the whip struck Jesus' back, flesh was torn out of His body, blood leaked out of His wounds; they struck Him to the point where the muscle was exposed. this is scourging.

Jesus had no strength in Him to carry His own cross. so the Romans hired a man of Cyrene to carry it for Him.

when they reached Calvary, nails were hammered through His wrists (not His hands, apparently, as the weight of His body would simply cause the nails to tear through the palms of His hands and He would fall) and His feet. then they erected the cross and mocked Him, pulled His beard, hit Him, charged Him to "save Himself if He was the Son of God".

what did Jesus do? did He call God to slay these evil men? did He ask His Father above to save him from his agony?

No. He told His Father: "Forgive them, for they know not what they are doing".

apparently, when one is crucified, they do not die of blood loss or injury, but rather, of suffocation. each time Jesus needed to take a breath of air, He had to pull Himself up; He had to lift up His torso each time and scrape His raw back against the rough cross, just to get a breath of air. criminals who are sentenced to crucifixion often die when they have no more strength left to lift themselves up to take a breath, and finally suffocate. therefore, to hasten their death, Roman soldiers often broke the legs of the criminals so that they would be unable to lift themselves up.

but that was unnecessary in Jesus' case. after an unimaginably agonizing period of time being hung up on the cross, Jesus lifted up His spirit, and He died.

He died so that today, i would be spared of such a fate. He died so that all human beings would be spared of such a fate.

don't you think that's worth my life's consecration?

WOOT FOR ME

I, Hui Linn Lee, quitted Restaurant City and Farmville on Facebook on the 12th of September 2009 due to a drastic lack in free time, as the mentioned applications required maintenance on a daily basis and, well, i figured that i just couldn't be bothered to continue anymore.

AAAAAND, what use are worldly things to me, anyway? haha yes i am eating my own words even as i write this but come on, we all have to start somewhere, right?

how do people know what to write about in their blog?

:LKHS:IJE:WLIJ:WELRIFJ:DKLSKULKEWFHLAUHFLEHDKSFLEWK

btw i'm a mini champ of Typing Maniac on facebook :)

when all is said and done

well i've got my results and they're more than pleasing, so i'm.... well... pleased.

also, i've finally finished my piano. i can't believe i'll never have to play a single scale or arpeggio ever again... unless i want to, of course.

just got back from penang. celebrated ah ma's eightieth birthday. twas fun, yes. nick and sara came down from the UK to celebrate it with us. FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN

now, i'm one day away from starting at HELP, and a few months away from aussie. HERE I COMEEEEE :)

out-of-body experience

two sundays ago (or was it three?), i sold second-hand books with ade, flory, bianca and her bf, joo and adrienne plus male friend. it was all very fun and games, really. i PR-ed with bianca alot, prancing from table to table in starbucks announcing our wonderful news: BOOK SALE! CHEAP READS FOR NEXT TO NOTHING! HURRY! EVERYTHING MUST GO! and other exclamations alike.

it was, i must admit, "fun". it was certainly rewarding to see the horrified looks on the faces of the heckled, as they mumble with much difficulty that they'll, "drop by later". HA. as if!
then it occurred to me that this is the exact same thing i do to those heckling. except i usually include a glittering smile that tricks 95% of hecklers that i'm actually going back to look at their knick-knacks. SUCKERS!

anyhow, back to the story. some people DID stop at our stall to run their eyes over our overflowing table: books, mags, stuffed toys, decors, shoes, you name it! i had originally thought flory organized a BOOK sale; i guess what's the harm in selling other junk if people will buy, eh? should've thought of it myself! haha.

one particular family came by that reminded me very very much of when i go shopping with my mum and brother. they stopped by our table. the brother sighed heavily as his sister proceeded to reach for titles such as "Becky Bananas", "Angels Unlimited: Budding star" and "Shopaholic Abroad". The first two were extremely suitable for girls her age; she must've been about twelve or so. but shopaholic? her mum wasn't fooled. the girl pleaded silently with her eyes and i could see her mum wasn't one to be crossed or whined at. you could literally see the prayer materializing in the girl's mind: "pleeeeease let me buy it. plllleeeeeeeeeease". all i could do as the shopkeeper-outsider was to stand by and smile at the girl in an "i understand" manner.
i was doing my fair share of crossing fingers. please don't look at the back!
her mummy turned the book around and furrowed her eyebrows as she read the synopsis. i could see the doors of her mind closing with a bang. slowly, she shook her head with her lips pursed, an expression that would cause any restless child to wilt immediately, and put the book back on its stand.
"No i don't think so. we'll just take these two lah."

the girl hung her head in defeat. i felt like patting her hand and saying, Ah, don't worry, soon you'll reach the age where you can read whatever you like! and Shopaholic will certainly be there when you're of age. okay? so don't fret. anyhow, i kind of agree with your mum. there are certain elements of Shopaholic that aren't suitable for young eyes...

i remember my own personal battles with my own mummy when it came to buying fiction. i wanted a funny chicklit read. she wanted "good" books that "taught me things" and that "had substance".

all i can say now at my wise old age of sixteen is that: MUMMY KNOWS BEST!